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Children and Grief During the Holidays

From the Counselor’s Desk:

It’s the most wonderful time of the year... and for a lot of us that is true! Unfortunately for some of us the holidays are a tough time of year! According to a new survey on adverse childhood experiences by the National Survey of Children’s Health (NSCH), almost half the nation’s children have experienced at least one or more types of serious childhood trauma. Some examples of trauma include physical, sexual, and verbal abuse, physical and emotional neglect, having a parent who is addicted to alcohol or other drugs, having a parent diagnosed with a serious mental illness, witnessing abuse of a parent, losing a parent to abandonment or divorce, and having a family member incarcerated. 

Signs a child is experiencing holiday grief 

Children may experience different types of responses such as a hypo or a hyper response. A hyper response is when a child has an increase in negative behaviors. This may include an increase in aggressive behaviors and/or anger outbursts. A hypo response can be described as a child who begins to isolate from family and friends, experience appetite changes, and sleep schedule changes often including sleeping more. 

With all the hustle and bustle of Christmas and the holidays sometimes the little changes go unnoticed. It is important to take a step back and look at the whole picture. Most importantly, remind ourselves as parents or caregivers that children often have a hard time communicating their behaviors in words so it often comes out in behaviors. 

Supporting your child emotionally during the holidays 

  • If there has been a loss in the child's life, acknowledge and honor it! (photos, story telling, special holiday traditions)

  • Get creative! (Inexpensive or even free crafts! Pinterest is a great resource, just search a theme!)

  • Read together with your child (you can even make this into a craft and make your own book with your child)

  • Quality time with your child (Don’t be afraid to be silly!!)

  • Get support from your child’s mental health therapist- Don't be afraid to ask questions! We are here to help!

 

Resources: 

Nearly 35 million U.S. children have experienced one or more types of childhood trauma « ACEs Too High 

Home | NAMI: National Alliance on Mental Illness 
Lifeline (suicidepreventionlifeline.org)