Navigating Thanksgiving for Kids with Sensory Difficulties and Selective Eating
Thanksgiving sparks joy in so many of us. Memories filled with family gathered together, comforting food, football on in the background, playing games with cousins, grandparents, aunts, and uncles. Some people look forward to it all year. For some children and families, Thanksgiving brings about feelings of anxiety, uncertainty, and dread. This is especially true for parents of children with selective eating and sensory difficulties. We want you to know, your concerns are valid and our Thanksgiving wish at Chatterbox is for all families and children to have a successful and fun Thanksgiving so you can focus on what is most important- family, memories, and joy!
Thanksgiving is an intense sensory experience for kids: lots of people around, it is loud, there are numerous smells floating around, an unpredictable and novel environment, uncomfortable clothes, and weird food textures. For children who thrive on their routine, the little changes that Thanksgiving brings about may be causing those tantrums: a different table, new plates, a different seat, foods that they have never seen, different people gathered around the table, a different meal time. These “little things” for some of our children may be detrimental to their sensory and emotional regulation, impacting everyone’s Thanksgiving experience. Let’s give our children with sensory difficulties grace and help make their Thanksgiving more enjoyable and tolerable.
Tips to make Thanksgiving enjoyable for kids with sensory difficulties:
1. Prepare: Discuss the plan for Thanksgiving, including where you are going, who will be there, and any possible sensory difficulties specific to your child.
2. Sensory input: Encourage 30 minutes of heavy work (climbing, lifting, pulling, pushing, crashing, etc.) to help your child feel regulated and centered prior to your Thanksgiving gathering.
3. Safe space: Make a game plan and let your child know that a break is okay and normal, and you are there to help them if they need it! Take a few minutes in the bathroom or outside to take some deep breaths or get a few squeezes in to help with regulation!
4. Provide tools: If you know your child does well with headphones in loud spaces-bring them, weighted lap pads may help with calming during meal time, and chewys help to provide proprioceptive input.
5. Placement: Some children get overstimulated by excess visual inputs, put those children on the end of the table where there is less in front of them, some would benefit from a kid’s table with everyone a little more spaced out that have difficulty with tactile and proprioceptive input, and children that get overwhelmed by bright lights should not sit under a chandelier.
6. Comfort: If you know your child struggles with tolerating certain clothing, Thanksgiving is a great time to allow your child to choose their outfit. There are so many other sensory inputs going on, having them be comfortable in what is on their body could be key for regulation.
Thanksgiving is centered around food. This is incredibly difficult and sometimes traumatizing experience for our children with eating difficulties. Thanksgiving meals include various textures, colors, types of foods, and often many new or non-preferred foods for children. From soft foods (mashed potatoes), to green vegetables, to mixed textured foods (stuffing and turkey), these diverse foods can be intimidating for some children. The very thought of Thanksgiving can bring up memories so strong that children may gag just thinking about it. In order to take care of our children and help them to have a better experience with Thanksgiving, please let us help you!
Tips to make Thanksgiving enjoyable for selective eaters:
1. Prepare: Practicing at home is a great idea! If you don’t usually serve family style, try serving dinner that way one night and discuss how this is how Thanksgiving is prepared. Discuss what Thanksgiving may look like and what types of foods may be present (talk about color, textures, shapes, sizes of the foods).
2. Safe food: Make sure there is at least one food offered that you know your kid will eat. Bread and butter, crackers are some food options!
3. Decrease focus on food: Most adults are guilty of telling their child dozens of times per meal to eat what is on their plate. Let’s change the narrative to take the anxiety off of our children. Instead, focus on other things like “wow, I love that you are sitting at the table with us today,” “I love how calm your body is,” “thank you for helping with dinner.” Encourage your family to do the same. If needed, be honest that your child is working hard at therapy on eating and their therapist recommends taking the conversation away from eating and onto more positive behavioral compliments and comments.
4. Involve them: Have your child help you make food. Children love to help and feel included! Have them measure out ingredients, turn the blender on, scoop, etc. Ask your child to help set the table or serve their family members! Kids are much more likely to interact with food when they know they are not going to put it in their mouths. Any positive interaction with food is a success! Having them scoop some potatoes onto your plate involves them looking at the food and smelling the dish.
5. Keep some consistency: If your child has a favorite cup, bring it with you. Having something safe and familiar may make them feel more comfortable at the table.
6. HAVE FUN! Play I spy or have a color scavenger hunt with food! This involves fun revolved around food and again takes the pressure off of eating it and exploring non-preferred foods in a non-threatening way. Have placemats printed out for the children and have them color their own! Think of things that food looks like “wow the mashed potatoes really look like clouds,” “the gravy in the potatoes looks like a volcano,” “the green beans look like branches,” “the carrots look like Olaf’s nose.”
However you choose to spend your Thanksgiving this year, we hope these tips help to make it enjoyable and memorable!